Maxim Online has an article about how to find an older woman and please her (if you’re a young guy that is.) I do agree with the article about the benefits, I have some experience with older women, but it’s written to make it seem like an elaborate game to just dump hormones, not something that can be meaningful. Or maybe that’s the way it is, and I’m just being young, dumb, and full of… err, anyways, read it, it’s interesting.
Younger guys and older women: Why should Ashton and Justin have all the fun? Rosie Amodio explains the benefits of Mrs. Robinsonsâ€¦and how to score one.
Maxim, June 2004
By Rosie Amodio
Like lots of girls my age, Iâ€™ve had a stud puppy. I was 26, he was 21. Heâ€™d been on some reality TV show, but mostly I dated him because he was young. I was tired of waffling late-20s commitmentphobes and wanted a fun, no-strings-attached fling. Who better than a hot guy I could brag about to my friends? Best of all, you donâ€™t even have to be hot: Since weâ€™d never introduce a boy toy to our friends anyway, your looks are irrelevant. Matter of fact, youâ€™ll be Brad Pittâ€™s body double in the stories we tell.
Why have a fling with a woman whoâ€™s, say, five to 10 years your senior? For one, weâ€™re usually further along in our careers, so we can pay for dates and impulsively spring for a weekend in Vegas. Ka-ching! But the real incentive is you can safely dispense with all the left-brain romancing that goes into trying to bed a chick your age. Thereâ€™s no â€œWhere are we?â€ Just â€œWhere are you? Letâ€™s do it!â€ Ready to join the club? Hereâ€™s the four-point plan.
The pickup: Look where young girls fear to tread.
Where do you find an older gal on the prowl? Look carefullyâ€”we make extra efforts to avoid the competition. Look for us at office parties (weâ€™ll crash our friendsâ€™), concerts (pick a girl-friendly band from five to 10 years ago), or late-night at bars (we donâ€™t have to run home to anyone). Or try volunteering for once: The gal youâ€™re looking for is ready to give back to societyâ€¦and to you, maybe.
Once youâ€™re in our habitat, watch us for signs of interest. While younger girls unconsciously shake their asses to BeyoncÃ© while ordering a drink, older women are completely aware of what signals our body language is sending. Is she making eye contact for three seconds or more? Is she brushing your arm while reaching for a napkin? Are her arms uncrossed, toes pointed in your direction? Sticking her tongue down your throat? We know when weâ€™re sending flirting signs, so if you see one, make your move.
But hereâ€™s the key: Once you have our attention, donâ€™t pretend you think weâ€™re 18. Make our age a plus by using flattering words like â€œsophisticated,â€ â€œelegant,â€ and â€œself-assuredâ€ to describe us. â€œA guy I dated picked me up in the cheesiest way. He said heâ€™d been watching me all night but was intimidated because I seemed worldly and stylish,â€ says Luanne, 31. â€œNormally, Iâ€™d laugh in a guyâ€™s face for that, but since he seemed nervous and sweet, I didnâ€™t care that it was a canned line. He followed up with some random story heâ€™d read in the paper. The easygoing conversationâ€”instead of small talkâ€”reeled me in.â€
Proof it works: â€œAn older woman doesnâ€™t expect you to be smooth as long as youâ€™re being respectful,â€ says Jim, 27, whoâ€™s made it work. â€œWhat youâ€™re going for is immediately understood: She knows itâ€™s a game.â€
The wooing: Show a little class.
If you want to turn the corner with this girlâ€¦uh, womanâ€¦act like a gentleman. Weâ€™ve had a lot of dates to compare you to, so donâ€™t skimp on the basics like paying for her dinner and calling when you say you will. Donâ€™t worry that youâ€™re leading us on: Weâ€™re sick of mind trips and will find your dependability sexy, not desperate. Weâ€™ll love a bunch of tulips without worrying that youâ€™re too into us or wondering why they arenâ€™t rosesâ€”none of that overanalytic female brain activity younger girls canâ€™t turn off.
But being chivalrous doesnâ€™t mean being boring. Weâ€™re burned out on cautious, see-how-it-goes first dates, and weâ€™re fed up with same-old, same-old corporate get-to-know-you talk. â€œI dated this 25-year-old who was such a party boy,â€ says Jane, 35. â€œWeâ€™d go see a band at a local club and stay out all night drinking during the week! I knew I couldnâ€™t keep it up indefinitely, but I also knew it wasnâ€™t forever.â€ The number one way to win us over: Show us a damn good time.
So be politeâ€¦and witty and fun. Age makes us women less uptight about sexuality, so you can be your off-color self. Tell the weird jokes, talk about the Paris Hilton video, even tease her about the age difference. (â€œSo, are you my Demi?â€) Donâ€™t be afraid to match our dirty double entendres, and feel free to steer a seemingly tame conversation about kitchenware into sexy banter on aphrodisiacs.
Proof it works: â€œSure, when I dated a 30-year-old, I tried to act more sophisticated. I dressed well, held doors, bought her flowers, wore cologne,â€ says Benjamin, 23. â€œIâ€™m sure I was nothing like the rich bankers she dated, but my efforts were genuine, so it really helped me impress her.â€
The shag: Hand her the reins.
You got her all the way to the bedroom door? Youâ€™re in for a nice surprise. More-mature gals are comfortable talking about sex, and weâ€™re also comfortable having it. We lead, you donâ€™t have to worry whether or not weâ€™re having a good time, and everybodyâ€™s happy. â€œThe first time Billy and I had sex, I was the boss,â€ says Jane, 29. â€œHe asked me what I liked and how I liked it. It wasnâ€™t dominatrixlike; I was just taking care of him.â€
Yes, older women are going to demand more foreplay, because we know what it takes to turn us on. But a payoff is that weâ€™ll demand crazier sex tooâ€”taking you to those porn star places you never knew existed. â€œOnce we went out, flirted all night, and didnâ€™t even make it back to my place,â€ says Karina, 36. â€œWe were walking upstairs when I grabbed Dave, knelt down, and went to work.â€ And youâ€™ll get more â€œforeplay,â€ too: a.k.a. more head than you know what to do with. Weâ€™ve shaken off our hang-ups about going down, and revel in the fact that we have the power to bring you to your knees just by getting on our knees. Whatever it is we do in bed, if it was the best everâ€¦and it probably wasâ€¦for Godâ€™s sake, tell us. Itâ€™ll just make us want you even more.
Proof it works: â€œMy fling was a crazy lady, I guess from experience. Sheâ€™s riding me, buck wild, when she stops cold, stares into my eyes, smiles slyly, dismounts, and starts giving me head,â€ says Alex, 27. â€œI almost died.â€
The adios: Be a man about good-bye.
Who knows, maybe you could get used to the expenses-paid weekend getaways and killer sex. Yep, she might be the one. But if not, sheâ€™ll appreciate your not wasting her 30s by lingering after the lust is gone. â€œItâ€™s a mental rush to date some 23-year-old guy, but itâ€™s weird if it goes on for too long,â€ says Jenny, 36. â€œYou realize youâ€™re not doing the things normal couples do, like meeting each otherâ€™s friends or going to movies on Saturday afternoons. Itâ€™s fun, but you start thinking, Should I be trying to get into a real relationship?â€
When do you say good-bye to your good-time girl? When you start experiencing the downs of a relationship (going to boring functions, shopping for duvets, fighting) without the ups (having fun hanging out together with your clothes on). When itâ€™s time, let us down with class and honesty. Tell us you think weâ€™re amazing but weâ€™re in different places. That way we wonâ€™t feel old and usedâ€¦just old and ready for real commitment. Trust us: If you break things off with style, youâ€™ll keep the memories of a bonk-filled good time for years to come. And maybe, just maybe, weâ€™ll keep your number on speed dial in case we need a booty call from a hot, young stud.
Proof it works: â€œThere comes a point when you canâ€™t keep up with their lifestyle,â€ says Jason, 25. â€œIn my case, it was time to call it quits when she made it clear she realized we had no future but started talking about wanting to have kids and stuff. A couple of days later, I told her, â€˜Youâ€™re amazing, and this has been a blast, but I donâ€™t think I can give you the lifestyle you deserve.â€™â€
But thanks for the shag, lady.
How to Spot the Prowler
Find the ones who want you to be their trophy boy.
Her hair is professional-looking, but the skirt is way too short for corporate America? She went home to change so that young bucks like you wouldnâ€™t mistake her for a grownup.
Self-respecting adults donâ€™t wear HELLO KITTY or U-PUMP-IT ringer tees out of nostalgia. She wore this hoping youâ€™d take the bait and use it for a pickup line.
Sensible shoes and a large bag (enough room for spare undies and a toothbrush)? Sheâ€™s prepared to stay out all night if necessary.
Catch a triangle of thong, a peek of garter, or another hint of something provocative underneath? She got dressed today thinking about undressing tonight.
MADE FOR WALKING
A walker may be a step too far. Unless youâ€™re actually turned on by the smell of Preparation H, make sure youâ€™re in the will before you bag the hag.